Friday, November 03, 2006

Go ahead and say it......I am a dork

I climbed into my car at noon in a good mood, ready for lunch. I started up my vehicle and lunch got even better. "Livin' on a Prayer" by Bon Jovi was on the radio....."Once upon a time, not so long ago." I turned the volume way up and traveled on to pick up my lunch date. As I was going down the "main drag" I noticed traffic backing up near a prominent intersection.

"What is going on?" I was thinking to myself.....all the while singing (at the top of my lungs) "Whoa-a, we're half-way there....Who-a, livin' on a pray-er". I realized that someone had decided to have a "garage" sale on the grass about three foot from the road and everyone was slowing down to see what all the commotion was about. After assessing the items for sale I determined that unless you were in the market for a run-down push lawnmower, or some over-used kid toys, you were out of luck. So I continued on....."Take my heart and we'll make it I swear..."

What, you have to be kidding. The two cars in front of me were pulling off the road. "What could they possibly want to buy at that sale?" It is at this point that I am hearing a note that I haven't ever noticed before in the song "Livin' On a Prayer".....Is this a different version?????Am I getting ready to be hit by a train????What is this noise????? I then decide to turn down the radio as well as my awesome lead vocals and find out what in the world is going on. THERE IT IS AGAIN......What is that noise???? Finally I looked into my rear view mirror and horror of all horrors, there behind me is the source of the noise. An AMBULANCE.....sirens roaring...blaring its horn at me. THIS IS WHY THE PEOPLE IN FRONT OF ME PULLED OFF....NOT THE FREAKING "GARAGE" SALE. I am such an idiot. Although this all transpired in the span of 5 seconds, I put up a fervent prayer that no one died because they didn't make it to the hospital on time.

I will just wait for them to mail me my ticket.

1 comment:

The Sour Kraut said...

I drive the largest SUV on the market. It's ridiculously huge. I feel silly because it's so big. Although we needed it to pull our old trailer, no one on the road knows that and I always wonder if they're sitting in their cars, looking at me like, "What does that mom need with a car that big? Hasn't she ever heard of global warming and our current obscenely high gas prices?" Well, that's what goes through my head anyway.

I also didn't hear the ambulance behind me once although it was too long ago for me to remember which song I had blaring on the radio. I tried to pull over into the right lane but the darn car was too big. I sat there in the middle of the intersection on an angle -- blocking everybody. I was honking and honking for the cars in front of me to go through the light just so I could get over. I swear I was sweating with anxiety by the time the ambulance could finally pass me.