Thursday, January 29, 2009

Boys will be boys

A couple of nights ago we were all sitting in the floor, winding down for the night. Of course, winding down consists of convincing our children that bedtime is imminent and can not be avoided. We do this by plopping them down on our laps and rock, rub, relax them into oblivion. I felt as if I was actually being somewhat successful in my endeavor. Mr. B is notorious for not wanting to sleep under any conditions, sans being in my bed with me. Of course, this is not the optimal situation for Mr. Forest......if you catch my hint.

During all of this so-called "rest and relaxation", Steven had the movie (and I use that term lightly) "Beer for my Horses" on. As Mr. B was leaning back against me I felt that he was indeed giving up the fight. I felt somewhat smug, thinking something along the lines of "like putty in my hands...." It was about this time that the "movie" had a scene involving Toby Keith, getting some bad guys and in turn, causing their truck to flip over. My sweet, almost asleep little boy, raised up off my lap and yelled, "That's what I am talking about!!!....... crashin' trucks" and then sank back onto my lap and curled into me again.

Boys...... go figure.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Hello again....

It has been awhile since I have posted. Actually, a very long while.

As I was reading a friends blog today, I was reminded of my own. After looking back over the posts, it reminded me of how much I enjoyed having a record of my life, as well as my family's. Sure, I have scrapbooks, and videotapes and pictures. But there is something about reading about the small things. The daily happenings. And it moved me.

So here I am. Posting again. Hopefully I will keep it up.

With this new resolve comes a new blog address. When this whole blog thing started, it was at the prompting of two of my friends. They set it up, and they named me. Miss Timber to be exact. Why? I am not sure.

Shortly thereafter, they became scared that their workplace had been tracking their computer use, which would have ultimately led them to my blog and then theirs. Because of this they changed their name again and I had to change mine. They decided to use the names that their true names were most misunderstood as being so I being, Kim became Karen. And since I was Miss Timber, at the time it made sense that my last name would be Forest.

That is how it went for years. At least a couple. However, my posts kept dwindling and I didn't like the direction my mind set had went. I was busy getting ready for a wedding, I was having some anxiety issues and I was overwhelmed. I decided to stop blogging, but I wanted to preserve the history I had already written about. So I moved my blog again. Geesh!

I haven't posted since.

However, since last fall, I have found a peace I didn't have before and I am not sure why. Not that I was in turmoil before, but I sometimes felt like I was wandering without direction. Sometimes I looked back at things I had written and felt they weren't good enough, or wished I were better and not so flawed. Sometimes I act selfishly, sometimes I swear, sometimes I judge. I am (majorly) flawed. As a perfectionist it is in me to want things to be perfect. Relationships, my house, .... myself. Let me let you in on a little secret. Life isn't perfect and niether am I. Period.

Before I felt like I didn't quite know where or in what direction I wanted to go. I feel differently now. In fact, I know that I don't have to go anywhere. In fact, I quite enjoy the view from where I am at. I can now look back at old posts, and at my past and recognize that it is filled with mistakes, and imperfection.....but it is what has made Instead of heading in a new direction, why not stay who and where I am and just...grow.

I know that I never want to stop growing personally or spiritually. And I have a new resolve to keep this "resolution" at the forefront of my mind. Reading blogs of other Christians who so completely and eloquently convey a message of hope and perseverance - despite or because of hardships - have given me insight, and hope that one day I might convey the same message to others.

After all, isn't that what it is all about. Encouraging and helping others? I think so.

I know my personal relationships with family and friends have definitely "helped me up."

It is good to be back.